Overcoming a Goalkeeper's Worst Moment: Justin Bryant

Justin Bryant is the current goalkeeper coach for NC State’s women’s soccer program and a former professional goalkeeper for the Orlando Lions, Dunfermline Athletic, and the Cocoa Expos. Although Bryant reached the 1995 USISL final in his last season as a player, an error in the 3-1 loss ended his professional tenure on a sour note. Bryant opens up about the frustrating mistake - and how he’s incorporated the lesson into his coaching career - before recounting a standout moment that paved the way for playing overseas in Scotland and England.

For more on an outstanding career during a time when being a professional soccer player was rare, if not viewed as outright ludicrous, check out Bryant’s autobiography, Small Time: A Life in the Football Wilderness.

What was one of the worst moments in your playing career as a goalkeeper?

The last game of my career was the 1995 USISL Championship game between the host Richmond Kickers and my team, Cocoa Expos. In the 10th minute, a ball played over the top, angling toward the corner to my left, beat our back three. I could see the Richmond attacker, Rob Ukrop, running onto the ball, and I thought, 'That's going to be a really hard ball to bring down, coming over his shoulder like that.' So, anticipating a less-than-perfect first touch from Rob, I sprinted towards him, thinking I would easily be able to clear from outside my box. I figured that even if he took a really good touch, the fact that he was looking over his shoulder meant he would never know I was advancing, and I'd be able to clear. So, bad touch or good touch, either way was going to work out for me.

What I didn't anticipate, though, was that he would take neither a good nor bad touch, but instead miss the ball completely. The ball skipped past him toward the corner, but since he was already running more or less in that direction, he easily adjusted to it. I, on the other hand, had to arrest my momentum and make a hard left turn. He reached the ball first, with his back to goal, and took a touch just outside the box, which meant I couldn't try to plunge at his feet and win the ball with my hands. I briefly contemplated trying to tackle him, giving away a foul if necessary, but was concerned about getting sent off for a tackle from behind (recent changes to the laws meant this was a real risk).

So I calculated that my best chance was to turn and sprint back to my goal. I actually made it back in time, but my charge from goal meant that one of my chasing defenders went in goal to cover for me, instead of picking up a runner into the box, and when Ukrop turned and crossed, he found Brian Kamler arriving unmarked at the far post, and he headed back across me into the corner. The crowd of 6,000 exploded, and I lay disconsolately on the cool turf, growing damp with summer evening dew. 1-0 Richmond. They would go on to win 3-1, the only game that season I lost.

How did you overcome the setback?

By this stage in my career, I'd become adept at moving past mistakes. And honestly, at that moment I didn't particularly feel I had made a mistake; I was angry at Rob Ukrop for missing his touch! In my mind, had he taken any sort of touch, good or bad, I would've easily cleared the ball. So in a funny way, I blamed HIM for what happened. This isn't really rational; in fact it's delusional. But in this case, it helped keep my focus off my role in the goal, and let me play out the rest of the game without feeling I had anything to 'make up' for, which of course can lead to compounding mistakes. Goalkeepers get in trouble when they start trying to compensate.

Later, when I had more time to think about it, and especially when I watched the video, I realized an additional problem was that my starting position had been too deep. When I played for Borehamwood in England, we played a very high line, and I got used to playing high in support, and dealing with balls played into the space. But the Expos played a deep-lying 3-4-3, designed to draw teams in and hit them on the counter, and I gradually became accustomed to a deeper starting position. Starting close to your goal has a comforting, almost narcotic effect, in that you feel reassured by the proximity of your goal, and you begin to feel that straying from it is 'risky.' The exact opposite is true; the larger that gap between you and your defenders gets, the more likely a ball will find its way there and punish you. That's what happened in this case.

What made this moment so hard to take was that it was my last game. I had already decided to move on from playing at the end of the season. I was about to turn 29 and had struggled for years in the lower levels of the pro game, barely making enough money to live on, and I was ready to move into coaching. So although it was a great learning moment, I never got to personally put into practice the lesson I was harshly taught, which was that while proactive reading of the game is great, committing to a course of action that is dependent on *something which might not happen* will eventually get you into trouble. In my case, it caught up to me on my last night as a professional player. But I have certainly made a point of sharing this lesson with all the goalkeepers I've coached down the years.

What was one of the most successful moments you experienced as a goalkeeper?

I had a number of moments I'm very proud of. I was the first high school player from Brevard County, Florida to sign a D1 soccer scholarship (at Radford University). I had a very strong debut as a 21-year-old American for Borehamwood FC in England, playing well and keeping a clean sheet in my first game in March 1987. But my best moment came in September 1988, on a preseason tour of Scotland with my team Orlando Lions. I had already played well in games against St. Mirren and Aberdeen, coming on to play the second half of each game in place of my boyhood hero, the brilliant Winston DuBose; but in the final game of our tour, against Dunfermline Athletic, I was given the start.

The terrace behind my goal was packed. As a kid who grew up enthralled by the atmosphere of swaying, chanting British crowds, I couldn't believe I was playing in front of one just a handful of years later. But I wasn't overawed by the occasion. I played well, making a number of saves as we were under heavy pressure for the first twenty minutes or so. At one point, I twisted to hold a close-range header, drawing a loud 'Oooooohhh' from the crowd directly behind me. Feeling pretty full of myself, I turned and showed the ball to them in a playful taunt. The first half ended, Winston came on for the second, and I felt I'd done my job well. I retreated to the dugout, satisfied.

But when the game ended 2-2, we found that Dumfermline had commissioned a trophy for the winner, which would be decided by penalties. Despite Winston's vast experience, I brashly suggested to manager John Higgins that he put me in. He seemed surprised, but said, "We'll ask Winston." And even more surprisingly, Winston was easygoing about it. "Sure," he said. "Go save a few."

We went back to the end I'd started in, the one with the packed terrace. As I jogged into the goal, I gave the Dunfermline supporters the overhead clap I'd seen so many goalkeepers give their home support. To my amazement, the entire terrace, in the spirit of a friendly match, returned it. The first Dunfermline penalty taker stepped up. I decided for no good reason to dive to my left, and he obliged with the kind of penalty keepers love: waist high and about three steps away, just far enough that it looks like a much more difficult save than it really is. For the second shooter, I thought, well, he's seen my save to my left; he'll probably go right. He did, low but not well-placed enough, and this one I not only saved but held. Two penalties, two saves. I still can't explain the feeling. It literally felt like a dream. Both teams scored their next penalties, and then Dunfermline hit the crossbar with their fourth, and we won.

Why was this moment was so important to you?

If you dream of being a professional goalkeeper, and then you get the opportunity to not only sign a professional contract with a team, but test yourself right out of the gate not against the Albany Capitals or Boston Bolts (with all due respect to those teams and others in the old American Soccer League), but instead the likes of Aberdeen FC, who beat Real Madrid in a European final in 1983, St. Mirren, and Dunfermline Athletic - full-time, established British professional teams - it's the very definition of a dream come true. If you're a kid born in Florida in the mid-1960s, who didn't start playing until age 13 and had no real coaching, and then just eight years later you're standing in Scotland in front of a packed terrace of fans clapping you, the emotional impact is overwhelming. I still think about it today.

More practically, because I played well in all three games, I had tangible proof that I belonged. My best level was going to be good enough. My greatest fear had always been that even if I maxed out my ability, I would be out of my depth and totally embarrassed. But that didn't happen. All aspects of my game were tested in those three games in Scotland. I got bombarded with crosses, I got crowded at corners and free kicks, and shots rained in on me from all angles. I did well enough, in fact, that Dunfermline invited me for an extended trial the following season. It didn't work out because I couldn't get a UK work permit - a persistent problem which meant I never really achieved my ultimate career ambitions - but that was beyond my control.

Overcoming a Goalkeeper's Worst Moment: Luke Mathieu

Luke plays for Byron High School and, perhaps most notably, is a life-long Watford fan. Luke opens up about a frustrating goal in the regional semi-final, how he’s tried to put it behind him, and a shining moment, despite the scoreline.

What was one of the worst moments in your playing career as a goalkeeper?

It was a regional semifinal on a miserable night. About 40 degrees with 25mph wind gusts. The opposing player started an incredible run from midfield and dribbled down to the right-hand side of my goal. He puts a looping cross into the box and the original trajectory of the cross is around the penalty spot. I take a step towards the spot to gather the rather routine-looking cross. That's when the wind took over and nestled the ball perfectly off the post into the corner of the goal. I was devastated that a rather routine-looking cross turned into the best goal of the year in my area.

How did you overcome the setback?

It was hard. We had played pretty well against a superior team and this goal broke my heart because we had 5-10 minutes of the first half left to keep them out and go into halftime with a tie game. At the halftime talk, I came out and tried to immediately forget about that mistake and encouraged my teammates around me that we were still in the game. That mistake was always in the back of my head for the rest of the game and we had trouble playing out of the back because of it. We stayed in the game for a long time, finally conceding two goals in the last 10 minutes on counterattacks after we sent out fullbacks further up the pitch.

I have not been able to change my routine in a competitive game yet because I haven't played a game since but I did adjust a couple things in my routine for my next training sessions and goalkeeper camps. I taped my fingers in reverse order. Instead of taping them from the thumb to my pinky, I did the opposite. I also have been thinking about a different warm-up routine before a game once I get there in a couple weeks, which I will implement when it comes.

What was one of the most successful moments you experienced as a goalkeeper? (This does not have to be related to the first question, although it can be. Simply recall a highlight of your career! It can be on or off the field, but ideally related to being a goalkeeper in some capacity.)

We were playing on a Saturday two hours away. Everything was going wrong that day. We left at 7 in the morning and we're stuck in traffic for about 45 minutes before finally getting to the field. We were playing a 3A school compared to us being 1A (meaning we were significantly smaller than the other team). They were so much better than us and not to mention, it was another miserable day. Pouring rain and 40 degrees. I promptly came out and made 26 saves during the game and only gave up 3 goals, when it should have been closer to 10.

Why was this moment was so important to you? Although there may be an individual or team award/accomplishment tied to this moment, please include the intangible aspects as well. Consider how the achievement made you feel and why it was so impactful. *

This was important to me because of the focus I had throughout the game. I could not afford to lose concentration or we would have lost by three times the margin we actually did. There were a couple saves I was really proud of that kept my team in the game at 1-0 and 2-0 down and in range of staying competitive with a team that was three times as better than we were. It gave me the confidence to talk more to my defense and lead the team in several different aspects. As a sophomore, this was huge for me and it catapulted me forward to have a really good rest of the year.

(We reached out to the coaches at Rock Island High School for video of the game but they never got back to us which was frustrating for me, especially after having that good of a game.)

Overcoming a Goalkeeper's Worst Moment: Brandon Miller

Brandon Miller is the starting goalkeeper for the Charlotte Independence, as well as the 2015 USL Goalkeeper of the Year. After a stellar 2015, Miller struggled to regain his form throughout the 2016 season. Read about the frustration of the difficult season, how Miller refocused himself, and a highlight from last season that Miller will “never forget”.

What was one of the worst moments in your playing career as a goalkeeper?

I won't say I had one specific moment that was the low point but the 2016 season was definitely one of the lowest points of my soccer career. I was coming off the best year of my career, having won a championship and almost every individual award I could. I went to Orange County with big expectations and instead of building off of a successful 2015 season, I struggled to find any type of form. I made mistake after mistake in almost every game I played. I can't pick just one poor performance from that season. My confidence was extremely low and I dreaded playing at that point in my career.

How did you overcome the setback?

After the 2016 season, I spent about two months away from soccer trying to sort my life out. When I finally signed with another team, I made a promise to myself to focus solely on soccer and put in the extra work I needed to get back to the level I knew I could be at.

Confidence comes with experience. Consistent repetition is a good way to build confidence. From the first day of preseason, I was doing extra work every single day after practice. Regardless of if we had two or three sessions that day, I made sure I was analyzing my game and working on the areas that needed improvement. I also had to be honest with myself and figure out why my confidence was so low in the first place. I put more emphasis on my mental health and gaining the mental strength necessary to perform at a high level on a consistent basis.

What was one of the most successful moments you experienced as a goalkeeper?

Beating NCFC 1-0 in our last game of the season in 2020 to secure the top spot in our group and our first playoff appearance in years. I had a pretty solid performance, making a couple key saves in both halves to keep the score 0-0. Running the length of the field in the 90th minute to celebrate our goal and playoff birth is something I will never forget.

Why was this moment was so important to you?

This moment was so special for me for many reasons. I was raised in Charlotte and I understand the rivalry with NCFC. We had struggled to beat them in previous seasons so to clinch our playoff berth on their home field was something special. Putting in a good performance and leading my team to the top spot in our group was another reason the moment was so important. As a leader, you always want to put in the type of performances you can be proud of and that was one of them.

Overcoming a Goalkeeper's Worst Moment: Lauren Watson

Lauren Watson is a Texas Tech alum and former professional goalkeeper, playing for Keflavík FC (Iceland) and Assí FC (Sweden). Before heading to Europe, Watson was a three-year starter for the Red Raiders, capping off her senior year with NSCAA All-Central Region and First Team All-Big 12 honors. Watson discusses the difficulties of playing overseas, how she pushed through the challenges, and a bright memory from her time in Lubbock.

What was one of the worst moments in your playing career as a goalkeeper?

There were many ups and downs as a goalkeeper but one that stood out to me was my last season in Sweden. Playing overseas can be tough for many reasons. There is always going to be a language barrier and you are flying across the world to play for coaches and for a team that you have never met. When I arrived in Sweden, I was the only goalkeeper and I had no goalkeeper trainer. We did have a young 14-year-old goalkeeper that trained with us, however the level of competition was not appropriate for a goalkeeper this age.

It was tough to train without a proper goalkeeper trainer throughout the entire 9 months I lived in Sweden. There were countless practices that I had to “warm myself up” and I was either having to tell our assistant coach or another player on the team what kind of warm-up I needed before games. This even put a damper in my mindset before practices and games at times. Although our team was very talented and had successful moments, there was no trust between coaches and players. This was something I was foreign to after building trust and communication with my college team.

How did you overcome the setback?

Unfortunately, this was one that was tough to overcome only because there was only so much I could do. Most things were out of my control and I was under contract. I would say that my positive mindset through adversity playing overseas is what got me through this tough time. I contacted a local goalkeeper trainer in the small town I was living in and requested additional one-on-one sessions. Any training with someone who has previously been a goalkeeper helps tremendously.

My American roommate, Rebekah O’Brien, (she is still playing overseas in Sweden) was a great resource for me to have conversations with. There were also times that we would do extra training before practice, after practice, and sometimes on our off days. I’ve learned that you have to make the most of every situation whether it is good or bad!

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What was one of the most successful moments you experienced as a goalkeeper?

Throughout my years as a goalkeeper, I learned that successful teamwork requires open communication, trust in each other, and selflessness. If each individual member of the team can demonstrate these qualities, there will never be a “losing” moment. I believe these qualities are especially important as a goalkeeper because our position requires us to lead from the back.

I put in countless hours of training on and off the field during my first two years in Lubbock and I was able to make a name for myself and show my team that I was the right person for the job. In my redshirt sophomore year of college we had a conference game against UT (University of Texas). This was a very tough game and this was another Texas rivalry team that we played every year. This moment stands out to me because my teammates witnessed how much I was willing to do to help the team be successful. Although we ended up losing this game in overtime, I showed my team and my coaches that I have these qualities. It was through my positive communication and sacrificing my body to prevent the other team from scoring that my team knew they could trust me as the last line of defense. This eventually led to extremely successful moments with my team during my college career at Texas Tech. Not only did we win the Big 12 Tournament in 2015, defeating West Virginia, who was ranked number 2 in the nation at the time, but we also advanced to the Sweet 16 in the NCAA tournament the previous year in 2014.

Why was this moment was so important to you?

The amount of work you put into being a selfless teammate, the more your teammates will notice. This pushes others to show their selflessness and become the best version of themselves on the field. This is so important for a goalkeeper because if your teammates work hard and sacrifice for you, the chances of the other team beating you becomes extremely slim. For example, your defender chases down an attacker that is dribbling directly at you with no one around but at the last moment your defender is able to make a clean tackle to prevent the attacker from having any chance of scoring. That is true selflessness!